My experience with a medium. Feeling depressed

Earlier this year, someone in my family lost their spouse. A few weeks after the death, an associate of this person and the spouse, a financial adviser, who had helped them with very heavy financial troubles and became a close friend, went to see a medium in another city, more than 2 hours driving distance away (he happened to be in this city). This person goes to see mediums now and then for his own personal reasons, and is used to not giving out any information at readings. He went to see this medium, who has a regular job and refuses to make himself a public figure, through word of mouth. The adviser-friend gave only his first name. Immediately after getting the reading, the adviser called my bereaved family member, completely bewildered, because the medium, out of the blue, had proceeded to bring information about the dead spouse and his intention to bring a message to the living family member. The medium, through a ouija board, spelled out the first name and family name of the deceased person, without a single mistake (including an unusually spelled first name), as well as the name of the family member, in addition to other evidential information brought forward.

Me, I had a so-so reading from a more publicly known medium last year, and paid a fair amount (not $1200 though!).
 
Last edited:
Earlier this year, someone in my family lost their spouse. A few weeks after the death, an associate of this person and the spouse, a financial adviser, who had helped them with very heavy financial troubles and became a close friend, went to see a medium in another city, more than 2 hours driving distance away (he happened to be in this city). This person goes to see mediums now and then for his own personal reasons, and is used to not giving out any information at readings. He went to see this medium, who has a regular job and refuses to make himself a public figure, through word of mouth. The adviser-friend gave only his first name. Immediately after getting the reading, the adviser called my bereaved family member, completely bewildered, because the medium, out of the blue, had proceeded to bring information about the dead spouse and his intention to bring a message to the living family member. The medium, through a ouija board, spelled out the first name and family name of the deceased person, without a single mistake (including an unusually spelled first name), as well as the name of the family member, in addition to other evidential information brought forward.

Me, I had a so-so reading from a more publicly known medium last year, and paid a fair amount (not $1200 though!).

I'm fascinated by the use of a Quija board as a way to genuinely access non-consious information...

I'd love to know some more detail about the story you've related Ian... Such as how the advisor/friend and the medium (together) proceed practically to getting a reading... ie room layout, anyone else present, who touches the puck, light levels, who has eyes open/closed/blindfolded... Who can see the Quija board when the reading is in play, and who can't see the Quija board etc...?
 
I don't know anything about mediums, but having used ouija boards myself, I suspect it was the medium and the subject (customer? Client?). Ian will probably clarify.

Usually, but it can be used alone as well. Most don't do it because of the "Never use it alone!" thing, that, AFAIK is mostly used as a plot device in movies.
 
Usually, but it can be used alone as well. Most don't do it because of the "Never use it alone!" thing, that, AFAIK is mostly used as a plot device in movies.

Yes, I have seen those movies (more like seen trailers or heard of them). I am not debunking. My experience with the boards were spooky enough that I quit using them. I was just speculating. But like I said, I am sure Ian will clarify. ;)
 
Now that I'm done working I'll weigh in here. I have experience with psychics, mediums and more importantly in this case, their customers. Where this story fails to impress me is that the described reading is wretched by any measure and while I suppose this kind of thing happens, everyone involved would see it for what it was. No one would put up with that crap. In all the time I was doing psychic fairs and hanging around these people, I never saw a customer caught up in a swoon of gullibility unless they were mentally ill. (There were some of those too.)

The tale being spun here is of the gullible believer, so blinded by their desire to connect with a loved one that they can't tell that they're getting scammed. But along comes the sensible skeptic to set everyone straight. Ya, I don't think so. People who are familiar with psychics and mediums damned well know a cold reading when they see one and anyone would certainly recognize something this obvious. Grieving doesn't turn your brain off, particularly when you're paying a lot of money.

That's why I think this is just some made up story to spin a tale of El fabuloso Señor Skeptic and his adventure with the Evil, Money Grubbing Fake Medium.
The point isn't to get into an argument over the validity of your opinion. The point is that you've chosen an inappropriate time to fight your battle against "Evil, Money Grubbing Fake Medium" stories.

If this were a skeptic shitting all over someone's story of how they found hope from a mediumship reading, when they had been distressed and distraught, you would be able to recognize that the skeptic was inappropriate, wouldn't you? Heck, even the hated Randi manages to recognize this. When asked at a live show in Australia, "how do you respond to a friend who ardently believes in ideas and claims that scientists and skeptics know to be nonsense?" he responded, "be kind". (Note: the phrasing of that question makes me grit my teeth.)

The other problem is that you are shooting your cause in the foot, here. If your solution to stories of exorbitant prices and fishing techniques is to call the victim a liar, what does that leave the person who knows they weren't lying? They now know that your claims aren't valid, and you've just made the whole thing worse by legitimizing their doubt. When skeptics do the same thing - claim that psychics are lying or that stories about successful readings are lies - you have no trouble recognizing that this claim isn't valid, right? Doesn't that help to solidify your opinion that skeptical criticisms can be safely disregarded?

Linda
 
  • Like
Reactions: Red
I'm fascinated by the use of a Quija board as a way to genuinely access non-consious information...

I'd love to know some more detail about the story you've related Ian... Such as how the advisor/friend and the medium (together) proceed practically to getting a reading... ie room layout, anyone else present, who touches the puck, light levels, who has eyes open/closed/blindfolded... Who can see the Quija board when the reading is in play, and who can't see the Quija board etc...?

My advice Max (although I hate advocating advice it sounds pompous) is not to use a Ouija board. It's not that something terrible will happen, more you don't know who might be lurking...as you may have heard :-) . But if you must have a go ..do it.
 
Quit the apologist crap Linda. It's obvious that there are several elements, including part of the medium's purported dialogue, that come from the same source. For someone so hellbent in finding correlations, you sure seem oblivious in this thread.
 
  • Like
Reactions: tim
Yes, I have seen those movies (more like seen trailers or heard of them). I am not debunking. My experience with the boards were spooky enough that I quit using them. I was just speculating. But like I said, I am sure Ian will clarify. ;)

Don't worry, I wasn't implying that you were debunking it. I just commented it, mostly because people are used to fiddle with the board in groups.
 
  • Like
Reactions: tim
Quit the apologist crap Linda. It's obvious that there are several elements, including part of the medium's purported dialogue, that come from the same source.

Again, it's not appropriate to turn a situation where someone comes to you for support into an inquisition about their sincerity. The risk of harm is not even remotely symmetrical (the harm from beating down someone who is already depressed and distraught is much worse than the harm from adding one more story about a mediumship fail to the thousands which are readily available).

For someone so hellbent in finding correlations, you sure seem oblivious in this thread.

You have me mixed up with someone else. I tend to tell people to be cautious when trying to make something out of correlations.

Linda
 
My advice Max (although I hate advocating advice it sounds pompous) is not to use a Ouija board. It's not that something terrible will happen, more you don't know who might be lurking...as you may have heard :) . But if you must have a go ..do it.

nope, I'm a bit shy of them... :eek: I do think there is an interesting effect going on which allows access to non-conscious information through ideomotor responses when a participant surrenders control, because they truely believe another is in control...

...just not exactly sure where the information might be coming from... obviously I think third parties are involved, but I wouldn't like to think I might expose some part of my own 'self', that would have better remained hidden... Brrrr... I don't like that thought at all!

Ever since I read those weird stories about people who have had both sides of their brain separated... You know one hand picks a tin off the shelf and puts it in the trolly, and the other hand takes it out again. You just don't know what parts of you may be in there, and I wonder whether opening that door might sometimes be regretted later... Lol..
 
  • Like
Reactions: tim
I'm fascinated by the use of a Quija board as a way to genuinely access non-consious information...

I'd love to know some more detail about the story you've related Ian... Such as how the advisor/friend and the medium (together) proceed practically to getting a reading... ie room layout, anyone else present, who touches the puck, light levels, who has eyes open/closed/blindfolded... Who can see the Quija board when the reading is in play, and who can't see the Quija board etc...?
I'm sorry, Max. I don't have all those details. The only thing I know is that the client did not touch the ouija board (!). I met the guy for the funeral service. If I see him again, I'll ask about those details.

EDIT: What I can say is that the ouija also spelled out the organ the body of the deceased that was affected by disease and caused death, and that other specific messages (what the deceased wanted to relate to his surviving spouse - which also contained evidential elements) was not through the ouija.
 
Last edited:
I'm sorry, Max. I don't have all those details. The only thing I know is that the client did not touch the ouija board (!). I met the guy for the funeral service. If I see him again, I'll ask about those details.

Thanks, I'd be very interested Ian...
 
The point isn't to get into an argument over the validity of your opinion. The point is that you've chosen an inappropriate time to fight your battle against "Evil, Money Grubbing Fake Medium" stories.

If this were a skeptic shitting all over someone's story of how they found hope from a mediumship reading, when they had been distressed and distraught, you would be able to recognize that the skeptic was inappropriate, wouldn't you? Heck, even the hated Randi manages to recognize this. When asked at a live show in Australia, "how do you respond to a friend who ardently believes in ideas and claims that scientists and skeptics know to be nonsense?" he responded, "be kind". (Note: the phrasing of that question makes me grit my teeth.)

The other problem is that you are shooting your cause in the foot, here. If your solution to stories of exorbitant prices and fishing techniques is to call the victim a liar, what does that leave the person who knows they weren't lying? They now know that your claims aren't valid, and you've just made the whole thing worse by legitimizing their doubt. When skeptics do the same thing - claim that psychics are lying or that stories about successful readings are lies - you have no trouble recognizing that this claim isn't valid, right? Doesn't that help to solidify your opinion that skeptical criticisms can be safely disregarded?

Linda

Linda,
I can only rely on my own experience and expertise as well as common sense. The OP story from Bill just doesn't ring true because it flies in the face of how people ordinarily react to what is obviously a terrible product. It is a story full of ego massages for skeptics and is utterly contemptuous of "believers." Bill is portraying his own relatives as basically being as dumb as a post. It seems to me that we could seem them as victims of Bill's character assassination.
 
Here's a post from back in February with my first experience with a medium. My personal experience was disappointing. However, my brother-in-law was a different story and it pretty much convinced me that there was something going on. Take it for what's it worth ...

http://www.skeptiko-forum.com/threa...r-personal-paranormal-experiences.1881/page-3

To keep this thread going, I wanted to share with you my experience with the physic medium Saturday. First ... I think he was the read deal. However, I was greatly disappointed with my experience personally. One of the problems that there were a relatively large number of people in my brother-in-law's house. I would say about twenty people total. The curious thing is that the group were all women with the exception of myself, my brother-in-law, and the medium. It is strange that women seem to be more attracted to this sort of thing than men ... at least from this experience. Anyway, I think the medium was a little overwhelmed with the number of spirits he had to sort out.

First me: The medium tried to give everyone in the room a communication experience which I think was his first mistake. Perhaps, he had a little too much pressure. I think if he allowed to let things happen more naturally ... it would be a better experience even though not everyone will get to participate. And I wouldn't have to be one of them in this case. As the medium approached me, because apparently it was my turn, I could already see he was going to struggle straight away. I could see he wasn't picking up any spirits that wanted to communicate with me. So he asked me if there was someone I wanted to communicate with. I told him my grandmother and told him her name. The medium picked up someone who was clearly not my grandmother and was probably picking up my wife's grandmother (my wife was sitting next to me). Not to go into any details, but the things he told me had nothing to do with my grandmother and seem somewhat foreign to me. However, my wife recognized that it COULD be her grandmother but neither one of us was completely sure. So, we chalked that off as a miss. I felt very disappointed as I could have really use some encouragement from my grandmother as well as hopefully explaining the lucid dream I had with her soon after she passed.

Second my brother-in-law and my wife: My wife's and her brother's Mom died when my wife was only 9 years old and her brother was only an infant. As the medium approached my brother-in-law (and my wife was nearby and was also able to communicate with the medium as well), he picked up their mother right away. Now ... up until this point ... I wasn't really sure about this medium because of my experience. However, the details he told regarding my wife's and her brother's mom was very accurate. I won't going into the details with the exception of this one thing that really stood out to my wife. The medium stated that "he smelled grapes!" When he said that ... my wife broke down a little and started nodding her head. He stated again ... "Why am I smelling grapes??" And my wife replied ... "As Mom was in the hospital suffering from cancer (that was already established), she couldn't eat anything but she still had a taste for grape Kool-Ade. In the hospital ... I would make her grape Kool-Ade and that was the last thing she really ingested, enjoyed, and could actually keep down before she died." The medium could never make that detail up. Even if I tried ... I could never find a way to debunk that. This convinced me that he was the real deal and that he was indeed communicating with my wife's mother.

So, overall ... it was a positive experience. And I'm thinking about having a personal reading with this same medium. I think I may have better results if it is just me in the room.
 
Again, it's not appropriate to turn a situation where someone comes to you for support into an inquisition about their sincerity. The risk of harm is not even remotely symmetrical (the harm from beating down someone who is already depressed and distraught is much worse than the harm from adding one more story about a mediumship fail to the thousands which are readily available).

Cry me a river, Linda. The fact of the matter is that the OP was a blantant lie, Bill's emotional state was never compromised. I do not jump over people who post actual personal experiences, regardless of which "camp" they belong to, but I have quite a nose for BS and will not let anyone more vulnerable fall into a trap. Hell, even after I posted the two stories side-by-side some people from the proponent side still replied to the OP with some sympathy.

But, not everything is bad... At least you got to use the hyperbole "inquisition" in a sentence, and I'm sure that made you happy.

You have me mixed up with someone else. I tend to tell people to be cautious when trying to make something out of correlations.
I have seen you drool over the Borjigin papers, which are all about correlations. And in fact, you were carrying the torch when the last one was published. Even when the other users involved in the conversation read the paper and concluded that your argument was not stated in it you carried on. So... No.
 
Linda,
I can only rely on my own experience and expertise as well as common sense. The OP story from Bill just doesn't ring true because it flies in the face of how people ordinarily react to what is obviously a terrible product. It is a story full of ego massages for skeptics and is utterly contemptuous of "believers." Bill is portraying his own relatives as basically being as dumb as a post. It seems to me that we could seem them as victims of Bill's character assassination.

That is, if they are even real. Craig, did you see the comparison of the OP to the CSICOP propaganda?
 
  • Like
Reactions: tim
Back
Top